Today, my husband and I went to the pool.  After swimming and floating for half an hour, we ended it by relaxing in the hot tub.

“Hunny, are you okay?  You’re so quiet.”

I looked at him and responded “Just tired”.

“You did a good job.  I’m so proud of you.” he said

Don’t get me wrong, I am proud of myself for going conquering my fear and going into the deep end.  But it’s still hard.  I was so physically and mentally exhausted.  Half my energy was focused on not freaking out while the other half was focused on the physical aspect.  Did I mention I also have asthma?  I got to the pool first before my husband.  I was in the middle of the pool holding onto an edge, trying to get use to my new environment.  Before, I was at a YMCA at a swim lesson – now it’s a rec center with open swim.

I spent a good 5 to 10 mins just floating on my back in the deep end – just trying to get my breathing even.  Working on getting comfortable.  Even though I can swim and tread okay – I am still not comfortable.  The fear is still there.  But I know I will get over it.  It will just take time.